Showing posts with label freakshow freakshow freakshow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label freakshow freakshow freakshow. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Jim Henson's Racist Babies PRESENTS: Where Are They Now?

For those familiar with the littlest Hitler, Adolf H. Campbell, who seems to exemplify the absolute worst case scenario for every adorable child you have secretly wanted to rescue from his terrifying parents after observing them in a grocery store and just knowing that whatever's going on there can't be any good, the question of whether you should name your child after a genocidal dictator and what the ramifications of that might be are obvious. (Answers: no, killing spree and/or lifelong virgin.) For those familiar with human evil as a whole, however, it also raises the question of whatever happened to those former child stars of white power, Prussian Blue. 

After extensive research, which comprised up to five seconds of heavy Googling, we have the answer: they became the off-brand, racist version of the Olsen twins. Observe!
 

Of course, one pair promotes a white nationalist ideology modeled on Nazism and works to exploit and strengthen an undercurrent of violent racism in American society, whereas the other pair is in a band called Prussian Blue. KIDDING. The Olsens never did anything worse than "Full House," and maybe murdering the Joker. Still, it's hard to say which pair is worse. (HINT: it is the racists.)  

UPDATE: Okay, so one thing I hate - apart from the racism - is when I write something and then immediately think, "that seemed easy; surely no-one has made that particular point before, but perhaps I'd better check...?" 

So, yes, okay, other people may have compared Prussian Blue to the Olsen Twins, but I'll bet none of those people have linked you to Prussian Blue Fan, a blog that appears to be maintained by Prussian Blue itself (themselves?) and contains photos of them hanging out at Natural History museums and getting ready for Homecoming that are somehow even more creepy than the band's official photos because the girls look so very normal and are not even wearing the Smiley Hitler t-shirts to signify that they are the Devil's own spawn. I, unlike those people, will link you to that blog. They don't love you like I love you. 

Friday, December 12, 2008

Linking Time: Had I a Tumblr, I Would Tumbl Thus

I do not, so let me say: I am so glad this blog exists. Also, its latest post. I'd always known that Modern Love was iffy, but seeing all of this at once? I mean, do you all remember the woman who complained that her (convicted rapist) boyfriend was too much of a pussy? ("I found it harder to love an emasculated boyfriend than one accused of rape." Oh, and also: "During sex, any sound I made alarmed him, and he’d recoil, so I learned to stay silent." FREAKSHOW FREAKSHOW FREAKSHOW.)

Anyway, Ashley "What the Hell Happened There" Cross and her rapey boyfriend aside (oh, OK, one more: "I believe he was a boy who endeavored for hours in the dark to express his drunken, fumbling desire in a way that, fair or not, ended up unraveling his life. I wish he had found me first." AUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHH) there is one portion of the post that, had I a Tumblr, I would Tumbl so:

perfectratio:

Due to my unshakable professionalism and/or the laws of human and/or Internet decency, I will restrict my comments to: well, that explains a lot.