How Can We Dismiss the Charge That Palin's Critics Are Merely Sexist? I Know! We'll Make a Blow-Up Doll!

Two ways to make sex jokes (or porn) about noted conservative figures: 

A) Recognize that the conservative viewpoint is fundamentally sex-phobic and therefore lame, and playfully situate the conservative in a context of super-louche uninhibited fun times, thereby demonstrating that sex is awesome and that the person in question is missing out. 

B) Embrace sex-phobia by conceiving of sex as dirty and shameful (particularly for women, who are pure because they are naturally averse to it), take that one step further by presenting sex as a process whereby men dirty women who've stepped out of line, and invite everyone to laugh at "that dumb bitch getting fucked," thereby taking basically the same right-wing stance as the figure you're claiming to parody, but branding that stance as "transgressive" and "progressive" because you show (gasp!) screwing. 

Now, I'm not saying anything conclusive, because I haven't seen the movie in question, but that Sarah Palin porno? Is a Larry Flynt joint. 

Boooo.

And Now... I Shall Look Into THE FUTURE!

Yesterday, I wrote that John McCain "has no use for you" - you being the ladies - "unless you're on his dick, and it shows." Well, check out his awesome scare quotes here:




Hey, "John," I hope your "melanoma" comes back and eats into your "brain."

Good Things To Think About When You're Bummed: All-Sarah Edition

1. Camille Paglia is still hilariously crazy.

On Sarah Palin's speech patterns:

As a lover of poetry (my last book was about that), I savor every kind of experimentation with standard English -- beginning with Shakespeare, who was the greatest improviser of them all at a time when there were no grammar rules.

Many others listening to Sarah Palin at her debate went into conniptions about what they assailed as her incoherence or incompetence. But I was never in doubt about what she intended at any given moment. On the contrary, I was admiring not only her always shapely and syncopated syllables but the innate structures of her discourse -- which did seem to fly by in fragments at times but are plainly ready to be filled with deeper policy knowledge.

2. BUST is still hilariously clueless.

On Sarah Palin:

Just imagine for a moment that Palin was on our side. Imagine that she was pro-choice, pro-environment, and all the rest of it. Now how excited would you be that we had a woman running for the highest political office who could raise 5 kids and govern a state at the same time? Who was some sort of Annie Oakley, moose-wrestling frontierswoman? And who could give a speech like nobody’s business? I, for one, would be thrilled... She’s a mother, she’s pretty she wears skirts! All of that put me on her side.

3. Sarah Haskins is still (intentionally) hilarious.

Let's ride the euphemism train to shit town!